This April will be the third year after the discovery of my partner's affair with a close family friend. The impact of their betrayal was catastrophic. I never thought that I could experience such pain and rage and the depth that this went to went to the core of my being. In essence, I was flung into the abyss. How does one survive that? and how do crawl out of it? I have asked myself these questions and many others. The truth is, you have to. This is a trauma that you must and will survive. I use the term must because there came a point for me where I told myself that they, and especially her, cannot win. She was not going to write the narrative of my life. She had inflicted a massive hurt upon me, but I was not going to let that define me and the rest of my life. Furthermore, the will to survive becomes paramount (well it did for me). That will came from the fact that I had to disconnect myself from this 'friend' who was now the Other Woman. What she was and what she represented was so far removed from what I thought she was. Furthermore, as a woman, I would never have done what she did. I have a moral compass, she does not.
For those of you who have suffered such betrayal please distance and disconnect yourself from the Other Woman. She is detrimental to your road to recovery. She cannot be a part of your life in any way shape or form and that includes hate. Do not even give her that because you are giving her an energy, be it a negative one, which could be used for much better things that could be of benefit to you on your road to recovery.
For more information I suggest reading the following ebook which is available on Amazon it is called, Don't give her your power! Also available is Alone which can also be purchased as an Audio book too, by Caroline Lyttle.
...Why does the pain of an affair hurt so much? That question can only be truly answered by those who have experienced it, and as someone who has, I hope this blog can offer some insight to the agony that you are facing.