One of the many downsides of infidelity and its consequences is that you also find out who your friends are.
In an ideal world you would assume that people would be neutral when a couple breaks up, but no that is never really the case. In this toxic situation a lot of people, I feel have sided with THEM.
Firstly, a lot of people were his and her family who I was friends with. However, as a result of the affair and their subsequent relationship being made public, I had no option but to cut off contact with their extended families. Their argument, which is the same as the betrayers, is that if two people fall in love they have every right to be together. Basically, they too, have put a romantic spin upon the tawdry situation!
Those who are not connected to either of them through kinship or friendship see it for what it is: two people who have been exceptionally selfish through their ultimately immoral actions. As I have said before, to compound this situation the ex-friend uses her belief in God to absolve her of her actions!
That is what makes this whole situation even more abhorrent! If it was someone who really didn't have a moral compass of sorts and, if I had no prior connection to them, the anger would still be there. However, in time that anger would have greatly subsided purely because I didn't know them beforehand. This is so much worse. An ex-friend with a devout belief in God but still feels justified to have an affair, walk out on her children and break up another family in the process.
Is it me or is this situation just so wrong on so many levels? You couldn't make it up!
...Why does the pain of an affair hurt so much? That question can only be truly answered by those who have experienced it, and as someone who has, I hope this blog can offer some insight to the agony that you are facing.