Hello again. This whole family break up thing has really made me look at how common and almost accepted that families break up. Why should that be the case? Surely if you make a commitment to someone you honour that. In my situation it was a friend who felt she had a right to be with my partner despite the fact that she was married and had children of her own. To make matters worse she is a 'pious christian'. To add to this toxic mix, she felt she had a right to be with him and that I should be grateful that she has freed me to find someone else!!!!
They both think like this towards me and her to her ex. How does anyone deal with not only a betrayal of that magnitude but the attitudes of the two people who did that? Instinct becomes almost primal in the sense that those who have hurt you in such a way, you feel you have no choice but to hurt them back. Well, unfortunately, it does not work. To react in such a way only fuels them and gives them justification for what they have done.
Instead, you have to ride the roller coaster of grief that is anger, rage, sorrow, agony the list goes on and with all those emotions rolled into one it can quite literally throw you over the edge. This abominable behaviour is a sure fire way to break up a family. It is painful and it is pitiful. The best revenge as one friend said to me is to 'live your life well.' However, to get to that point you will have to navigate some seriously stormy seas. Seriously, having an affair is a sure fire way to break up a family!
...Why does the pain of an affair hurt so much? That question can only be truly answered by those who have experienced it, and as someone who has, I hope this blog can offer some insight to the agony that you are facing.