When I first found out about the affair I was in a mess as to how to deal with the situation, it was ugly. Friends offered advice but they truly didn't understand what I was feeling and how could they? No one I knew had gone through this or were going through it either. I had to search elsewhere to get some form of support so I visited a forum called the healing heart and I have to say that it was a lifesaver. Those people that were on that forum understood exactly where I was coming from. For months on end I read so many stories of people on there who had been betrayed by their spouses. It was truly heartbreaking. However, what was so positive about this site was the support they received from the other members and for me it felt like I wasn't truly alone.
Having not visited it for a while I went back on last night and read a post that practically mirrored my own situation. It was entitled: 'when the OW is a friend'. When I read it brought back all those intense negative feelings that I had when I first found out about the affair. I don't know what the infidelity statistics are with regards to this particular type of affair but I seem to be reading more and more stories of women who feel they have the right to break up families that they know quite well. This post was another example of that. I truly recommend infidelity forums such as the healing heart because the advice and support they give is second to none. What's more, those that are there offering the support have suffered the pain of infidelity so they are in a much better position to offer advice to all the newcomers to the site. Furthermore, I feel the overwhelming thing that comes from their advice is that you do eventually come through it and that you can survive infidelity even though the road to recovery is so very, very painful.
...Why does the pain of an affair hurt so much? That question can only be truly answered by those who have experienced it, and as someone who has, I hope this blog can offer some insight to the agony that you are facing.